Published: June 27, 2013
by MARCELLE PICK
Core
negative beliefs keep us stuck, frustrated—and often fat.
MOST
OF US HAVE an endless loop
of negative thoughts that plays in our heads, a negativity script scrolling on
our inner teleprompter that was written so long ago, and plays so continuously,
that most of us are hardly aware it’s there. This negativity script eats up an
incredible amount of energy, goodwill, and self-esteem. Feeding this well of
negativity often leaves us with an insatiable emotional hunger, which we
frequently misinterpret as physical hunger (especially if our biochemical
conversation is off). This script is the sound of your inner conflict, and the
louder it plays, the more stressful it is on your body.
You may be
tempted to think you don’t have a negativity script, but let’s try this
exercise. Below, I’ve listed just a few of the most universal statements that I
hear from my patients. Read them and circle any that sound familiar—any that
you’ve ever said about yourself.
§ If I could
lose weight, I’d be happy.
§ I hate the
way I look. How did I let this happen?
§ I hate my
hair/skin/legs/breasts/thighs [fill in your own body part].
§ My life is
such a mess.
§ Bad things
always happen to me.
§ I don’t have
any time for me.
§ No one will
ever love me/want me because I’m so fat.
§ I feel so
unattractive.
§ I’m just so
tired/angry/anxious/sad.
§ I’m a _____
[loser, liar, faker, worrywart, shrew, bad mother, bad wife, bad friend—fill in
your own self-criticism].
How many of
these statements sound like something you’ve said to yourself? How often do you
find your inner voice (the sound of your intellect) giving you a good drubbing?
Now take another minute and choose any of the following statements that you
feel are sincerely true about you:
§ I am amazing.
§ I take
terrific care of myself.
§ I am getting
the love/appreciation I deserve.
§ I am sexy.
§ I am beautiful.
§ I take time
to play every day.
§ I’m honest
with myself and others.
§ I’m good
enough.
§ I am worthy
of love/money/commitment/pleasure/_____.
§ I’ve
accomplished a lot.
The
negativity script wouldn’t be a big deal if we didn’t secretly believe all
those terrible things we say about ourselves. But we do. Without a meaningful,
powerful counter to these negative thoughts, is it any wonder that they become
what you believe about yourself deep down inside? We unwittingly set a place at
the table for these core negative beliefs and they keep us stuck,
frustrated—and often fat.
Your
negativity script can change. Just as you can “talk” to your cellular DNA with
food, you can “talk” to your conditioned psychological responses through
different kinds of therapies and change them. But you have to take the time to
unearth the root cause. It takes a lot of work, but if you do it, you’ll find
that the internal heckler finally shuts up. You just don’t have to listen to
her anymore.
Marcelle Pick co-founded Women to Women in 1983 with a vision to
change the way in which women’s healthcare is delivered. Marcelle undertakes a
holistic approach that not only treats illness, but also helps women make
choices in their lives to prevent disease.
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