by Peggy Jentoft
Many healers and others are from really dysfunctional families, and or have a lot of pain in their lives and a lot of questions about their experiences and how to work through them.
Here are some thoughts about karma, and some other theories I have encountered:
I have heard that before we are born, we choose our companions on the basis of our mutual sixth aura level. That level is tremendously different from the first three levels we deal with while incarnate. The sixth level is a highly spiritual and intuitive plane. When we are discarnate, we are unable to see much below the sixth level, so it's a bit like making decisions about the ocean floor from a mountain top.
I met a couple of hypnotherapists who had done several hundred past life and between life regressions, and they told me that people often recalled angels and guides trying to talk them into making easier plans for the life ahead, or to wait for less rigorous conditions and companions, but that the people were often too eager to get born to wait. They wanted to get absolutely as much work done as possible, and insisted on pushing forward.
When one life is viewed as a mere fragment of the Whole Personal Universal Reality, an entire lifetime is in scope like playing one video game or reading one novel or going to one movie. We sometimes choose horror novels or war games and tragedies over romances, comedies or adventure tales.
We are all already bodhisattvas. To be healers in the best sense, it is important to understand suffering, and learn to heal from the inside out and develop genuine compassion for all creatures. This is why we choose these experiences. We may also choose these experiences in order to help others, or to guide and change society.
A primary cause of suffering is the inability to forgive and to love ourselves. We draw experiences to ourselves in an effort at redemption. A most important lesson of karma is that punishment is not essential or needed at all; it is indeed harmful to self. "Judge not" applies to self. We can choose to expiate negative karma by being healers and teachers, or just by being kind and loving, and working/playing at becoming wise.
It is important to recognize our feelings about our painful experiences. It is even more important to FEEL our feelings. Much suffering is created because we attempted to not feel pain and anger. When we have felt the pain, anger, hurt, etc., we can let it go. LET IT GO. Feel it and release it and move on.
When you forgive you are not required to block your memories and pretend that the injuries never happened. The act of forgiving and releasing within yourself is the process of dissolving the cords that keep you in the energy of suffering, hooked to the past, dragging it along with you.
No matter how deeply a person has buried the diamond light of divinity within themselves, it is still there, just as it is within you. To recognize that light within yourself and within those who have hurt you is to free yourself from the need to repeat this experience. The only genuinely beneficial revenge is to become truly happy yourself.
It is fine if you cannot yet forgive. You can work at forgiving. By this, I do not mean making everything okay, but rather finding a place where whatever you're forgiving has no energy in your life; it's not an issue to you anymore. Become alive and glorious and full of joy in the life you have now. You have survived whatever happened in the past; you have triumphed in that you are Alive and Free now.
When you recall a moment of pain from the past, mentally return in your present body to that moment, and tell the child that you were then that you have survived, and that it is time for that part of you to come forward into the present and rejoin the whole. See your current world from that child's viewpoint, and realize all the wonders you have now.
When you have released the energies that hold you in the pain, you will be free of that relationship and filled with compassion for people who have not yet found peace. I do not mean to say that you must forgive and love unconditionally those who have hurt and harmed you. It would be nice if we could acknowledge that deep inside, they may have a Buddha nature that has the potential for enlightenment, even if we can't see it.
Any time we continually reopen and pick at a wound, it will not heal. It will become putrid and infected. You owe it to yourself to work on healing your wounds. Spiritual gangrene of the heart will destroy you as effectively as gangrene of the body destroys the flesh. This applies to emotional abuse wounds as well as all others.
Unconditional love starts with loving the self. Happiness begins with appreciation: appreciating what you have and know now. Happiness is born of looking for the joys of the moment, and reaching out for more moments of joy and pleasure. As long as you are alive, life can get better, but you have to make that happen with your own energy. As long as you define yourself in terms of your past suffering, you remain in pain in the present.
One of the things I have learned is that there is always someone whose life makes your hard times look like heaven. There are always ways to find joy and ecstasy in the mere fact of being alive, if you look for them. All life is precious and beautiful. Yes, sometimes we chose lives when we were tortured, abused, starved, neglected, etc., as preferable to not having a life and body at all.
We are here because we wanted to be. We won the spiritual lottery to get here and take part in these glorious times of transformation. We incarnate beings are the few, the proud and the lucky, regardless of the outward appearance of our lives. Despite past pain and suffering, we need to get on with our own lives now.
I am responsible for creating my own happiness. Whatever has happened to me in the past, I am in charge of how I live and feel NOW.
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Copyright Peggy Jentoft 2001-2002, all rights reserved. Reprinted here with permission.
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